Q) You know how I know your gay A) Cuz your gay

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It’s dead.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

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What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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A man walks into a pole.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

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What did the two fire men say to each other whilst a house was burning? Well be better put that fire.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Poop

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

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Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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