How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

How much Cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? A lot!

Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Why did Ramsey fall off the seesaw? Because while he was playing with friends on a seesaw at a nearby Country Club, a very angry and insane man who had many handicaps, decided to solve his problems by killing someone. A funeral was held a week later.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

Make little things count Teach midgets math

What time is it? 20:45.

Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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