What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

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What is brown and sticky?

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Superman: Batman, can you drive? Batman: No, but I can drive the batmobile.

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So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

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How do magnets work?

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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If you are good at taking quizzes, you are quizzical. What are you if you are good at taking tests? Testical.

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Benevolent villain.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris

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Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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A Nazi ran into a Bar.

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what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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