okay.....

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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A seal walks into a club.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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