What do black men do in the South? Hang around

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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barack osama

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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nbjhfghl

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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