What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

i have cancer

Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

I love you.

Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

What happens in the end of the original "Pinocchio" Italian fairy tale? He is hanged.

How did the mecanic die? He drowned

anti-joke teehee

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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