How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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What's your guys names?

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Person A "did you hear about the cure for AIDS?" Person B "no." Person A "neither did I."

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why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

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What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops