Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

A kid has no friends.

You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

knock knock Dave's not here.

Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

Women's Rights.

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...