Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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http://www.dafk.net/what/

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

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Why did the student go to university? To pursue a higher education.

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

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What did the army guy say when he lost his gun. Wheres my gun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because due to the crashing economy he feels the need tom travel far distanced for work and food to support his growing family, this causes him to take dangerous routes of travel through hazardous areas with fast moving automobiles that potential have the chance to kill or severely Maine the distressed chicken. Not only does he have to cross these roads twice a day he is also under the added pressure of many millions of people questions why he takes such chivalrous actions to save the his future descent and the steep decline in the population of chicken.

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If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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