want to hear a joke? then go ask someone else i dont know any.

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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I walked in ony my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet. Violet is a color already.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

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What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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good looking women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops