Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

Women's Rights.

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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