Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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What did the woman say just before she was stabbed eleven times in the chest thus killing her? Nothing, she had been gagged.

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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Q. What did the 300 pound Asian get for Valentine's day A. A jetpack. Except for the fact that the previous sentence was an obvious lie making this whole joke irrelevant.

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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What's worse than having an ugly face? Having a face like yours.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

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yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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potatoes

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How do you save a black person from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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Why did the little boy have to go to the hospital? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a train.

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when a friend comes over and says: hey, do you have a bathroom??? NO!!! I shit in my yard!!!!!

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Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

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Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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