Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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WHY CANT THE ENGLISH MAN FIND HIS.....PANTS? BECAUSE HE NEEDED TO LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! LOOK HARDER ENGLISHMAN!!!!!!!!LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yell this joke out loud and u will realize that its really funny!!! ^-^

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What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

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What is the black kid down the street getting for his birthday? Well first of all, his name is Pat. And he asked his parents for an Xbox that he will likely receive, and I assume a variety of other gifts from friends and family.

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A gay Asian guy walks into a gay bar where he found a fruity looking black man... The Asian went up to the black man and said, " how'r they hanging?" shocked with anger, the black man hits him in the face, knocks him to the ground and said, " YOU DO NOT TALK TO MY FAMILY THAT WAY. BOTH MY GRANPARENTS WERE LYNCHED!!!" the Asian stands up and brushes himself off... He turns to the black guy and says " I meant the balance scale at the table you were were sitting at" the black fellow turns to the table with the notebook and the balance scale with rocks on both sides that he was sitting at... He turns back to the Asian man and apologizes for his rude behavior and buys him a drink... (2 hours later) they have sex

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Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because that's where all of the other chickens are.

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Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

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Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Betty White's wrinkly ass skin.

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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