What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

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Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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My kids are mistakes.

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Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

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yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

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Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

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Tony Romo

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops