An irish man walks into a bar... Hes met with an intervention of family and friends who are all very concerned about his drinking problem and well being.

Mum: Black or white iPod? Her Son: Black Please, it'll run faster.

what's gay as AIDS? The way you got it

Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

How are cars made? By magic.

What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

Two men walk into a bar. It turns out the bar was a lever and set off a bomb. They both died.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He didn't, the farm this chicken was on had fences bordering it to avoid this very situation.

i want to meet Dora's parents and ask them why they let that bitch go everywhere

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

The Game

why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

What's brown and sticky? A stick

What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

Why didn't the woman cook dinner for her husband? She had to work late.

Why did the Chinese man have a cat in his oven? Because his wife had decided to divorce him that day so he threw he in the oven, and the cat happened to be in her arms at the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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