Knock knock Who's there? Be Be who? Be yourself

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

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What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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25

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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John Stamos.

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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What do you say to man with no hands. How do you feel.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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