shauns beautiful

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Sloth runs...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red and violets are in fact violet

thumb_up thumb_down

You're smart... And I can tell a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down

I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

thumb_up thumb_down

2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

thumb_up thumb_down

Chuck Norris can cook ramen noodles with a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down

Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

thumb_up thumb_down

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down

TOBUSCUS

thumb_up thumb_down

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

thumb_up thumb_down

KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops