Whats worse than an oompa loompa a black midget

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

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Jacob Edwards has friends

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what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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What's the difference between a Justin Beiber concert and a hedgehog? With a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside, but in a Justin Beiber concert, the pricks are on the inside.

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

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So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

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u jelly?

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"You two form fours while I get the other one"

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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Why do vampire's from 'Twilight' sparkle? Because it's a really bad movie.

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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