What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

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Why did the Asian eat rice? Because its food

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What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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- I'm in my mum's car, broom broom. - Get out me car. - Aw.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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whats the difference of the mexican and the bench the mexicans alive

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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What did the autistic child say to the doctor? Nothing. His condition is so severe that he is mute and may never talk for the rest of his life.

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

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Ask me if I'm a kangaroo Are you a Kangaroo? No….

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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