your mother hates you

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

27

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

thumb_up thumb_down +18

On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

thumb_up thumb_down +18

do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A blind man walks into a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between an apple and an orange? 87

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops