What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

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What did the man say to his wife right before they got married? "I do."

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Whats better than 24? 25.

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What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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