Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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