whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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