Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

A man walks into a bar. Sup.

Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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