Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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Honk if you're Amish!

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What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

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what do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms? Trust worthy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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Boob

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops