Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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One time i was sitting down

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they told me not to write here but i did

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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