Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

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What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

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What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

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what do you call a professional gamer Their name

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A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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Your life

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? Ones a person and the others a bench.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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