Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

thumb_up thumb_down -26

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops