Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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I have a dirty joke. Poop.

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Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

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Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

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James Patrick Campbell

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops