hola said the chinese man

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If you rewind Gozilla, it's about a giant lizard that helps rebuild a burnig city, and then goes back into the ocean again...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So a guy is playing jeopardy and decides to choose the category "Therapist." so he tells the host, "I'll take the rapist for 200."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why the did black man climb the ladder? To get on the roof of the building to install a satellite dish.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops