Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -17

the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A moose walks into a food store. He asks the lady working there where the potatoes are. She says "go down aisle 5.'' he goes down aisle 5 and there arent any potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Jew walks on his way to work. He does not notice the quarter lying on the sidewalk and did not care for the dollar lying on the other side of the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Women's Professional _________

thumb_up thumb_down -17

My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

sorry son your nanas been put down

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops