How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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If your reading this, youre not blind.

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I like U.............................nicorns :D

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Found out the difference between onions and men. I don't cry when I'm chopping up men.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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why are anti-jokes so funny? Because you are expecting them to encompass one idea of irony, but instead sometimes give a logical explanation to the question.

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

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Lindsay Lohan

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

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Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem. Q: What do you call 100 Chelsea fans on the moon? A: An even bigger problem. Q: What do you call all the Chelsea fans on the moon? A: Problem solved hahaha Q: What would you get if Newcastle were relegated? A: 45,000 more Chelsea fans

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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whats the best selling shampoo for children and family? gerrmany's shampoo german engineering. i'm not sure I get anti jokes wait you don't need engineering for soap? HITLER DID -audience- thats mean who else was mean? uhh Mao? Stalin? STDS? -audience- no HITERWAS MEAN wat happen to him he became the leader and fuher of germany and was onn world domination? no he died abullet and a pill died killed him oh god 11 million people died because of him and we make jokes about it -its ANITjokes okay? t make this S$75 any better doesn't revive the fallen -okay......... LOL I bet that soap was actually eaten before by actidneet -jesus shutup okay ok.. sorry man .. wait man? single person? but waht abut "audience" I guess I want a crowd as big as hitlers but all I get is my twisted autism - billy turner died from autism and arrested for practicing naziism in public.

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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