what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

Wanna hear a funny joke? Oh, I was just asking.

Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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