I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

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The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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You idiot thats 9 letters

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Smelly Indians.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

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A van drives into a car.

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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