Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

Good to see you today!

What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...