why did joe drown ? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a generally un likeable person who has a habit of drinking in a bar? A Bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two penguins are sitting in the bathtub, the first one says to the second one "pass the soap." The other penguin says," what do I look like a radio?"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

One day a priest walked into a prison to bring lost souls to the Lord.....Not his best idea.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

thumb_up thumb_down +7

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what's 9+10? 19, not 21

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops