What do you call the CEO of a successful company? Rich.

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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whats the difference between a black guy, spook and a porch monkey? they are all stupid, stinky, n-i-g-g-e-r-s!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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Keanu Reaves

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why was the black man blind? because he was black.

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how do you fix a family? Someone gives in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops