I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

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Compton

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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What do you say when Obama gets shot? Some finaly had enough balls to shoot a black person. N.P.P.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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What did Billy get for christmas? Nothing he died of lung cancer.

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

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What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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jeremie er en ape hvorfor er han det? Who cares!

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You have a birthday party and invite 5 celebrities: Britney spears, Lady Gaga, Hulk Hogan, Barack Obama, and Oprah. Meanwhile, there is a cow in a nearby pasture pooping.

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George W. Bush

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I just read the long joke posted earlier. I have no life. :(

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i love antijokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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