A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops