What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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what is big and can make things come out? a gun

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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I went to school. Then I came home.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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