In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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willam dafoe

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

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Why was Cathy sad. Her husband Drew was killed by a land mine on a peace keeping mission to Iraq.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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What's the difference between a duck?

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No antijoke here.

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How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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