A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

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who's a slut... you're mom

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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