why did the dad stop working on the roof he fell off

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a structure used to support sitting people, the other is a human being native to Mexico.

The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

WOw you have no life

Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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