Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

you know whats better than lemonade? sex

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

You idiot.

What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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