'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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Q: Why Marc can't run? A: Marc is a leaf.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

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What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops