How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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What do you call a three-legged cheetah? Crippled.

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whats up and also down? your mum

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

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Why didn't Anne Frank ever leave the attic? She did.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Chris Bosh's neck

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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Caca.

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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Your Mother

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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