Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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What is red? A rock painted red

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what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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What starts with Pu and ends with Y, And homosexuals tend not to like them. "Pushy" People.

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

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a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

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What's funnier than a Laffy Taffy joke? Almost anything.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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