what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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i like pie

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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clamidia

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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