A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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Knock knock Whos there Your Ma Your Ma who Your ma's in jail!!!

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

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Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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hi jonny

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

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COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

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haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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