What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

who dosent like to wear shirts and is not straight Petko Manchev

what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

I wrote a funny joke.

How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

Knock Knock, Ow my face

What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

What's brown and adhesive? A stick

how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

A mormon walks into a bar.

Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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